Saturday

6.00am  – Rise early to avoid the family. Sit down at computer. Write sentence.

6.05am – Dogs realise you are up, start whimpering.

6.10am – Let dogs out the front of the house. One takes off down the road. Chase after in pyjamas, asphalt pinching into bare feet. Fit looking blokes training for some sort of cycling race ride past trying to ignore crazy woman, with mismatching PJs’, running wildly down street.

6.20am – Water for dogs. Seeing as I’m up may as well throw in a load of washing.

6.30am – Back to computer. Can’t remember what I was going to write about.

6.50am – First child appears “why are you up so early?” she asks. “Remember I’m still trying to do this writing challenge. You know I said I was going to be busy this month.” Child replies “Is it still November?”

7.00am – On a roll now, have got a whole paragraph written.

7.15am – Husband emerges complaining about our uncomfortable bed (it is quite literally an antique having belonged to my Great Grandmother).

7.30am – Coffee. Husband sits on lounge in second living room (where the computer is – because everyone knows you have to keep the computer out in the open so you can check that the children aren’t surfing the net for porn). He advises me the lounge chair in here is more comfortable than the one in the main living area.

“What are you doing?”

“The writing thing.”

“Oh is it still November?”

7.50 – Trying to remember what the hell I wanted my main character to do.

8.00 – Eldest child emerges from bedroom.

“Right you need to be ready by 11.30, H’s mum is picking you up to go to B’s”.

8.15 – Hang out washing.

8.30 – “How am I getting to B’s?”

“I can’t do the dance, why did I start doing dancing, I don’t want to go in the concert.”

“I’m going to Bunnings, I won’t be long.”

8.50 – Start writing a mad, crazy battle scene. There’s one cranky woman with a gun, spraying bullets everywhere.

9.00 – Have shower.

9.30 – Get a couple more paragraphs done.

10.30 – “Right you need to be getting ready to go to B’s, and you need to be in the car now for dance.”

11.30 – 12.30 – Dance. Discover you need fluro shirts and hair nets for the dress rehearsal tomorrow. Friend Ally gives me hairnet from her pack of three. We both head to shops seeking fluro shirts.

1.30 – Home. Discover fluro top too big. She’s a weird size, long and lanky she doesn’t fit the average make of anything at the moment.

2.30 – 3.30 – Actually being left alone but brain seizes up and I stare at screen for an awfully long time without writing anything.

3.40 – Arrange to pick up Mum to go to the beach for dinner.

5.30 – Collect eldest from B’s.

6.00 – 8.00 – Pizza at the beach.

8.05 – Try writing again. Youngest starts to read over my shoulder. Now it officially sounds crap –  once you read it aloud.

8.30 – Give up and open the wine.