I managed to catch a bit of Offspring last night. I know it’s a national crime but I’ve never watched the show. It appears Nina, who lost her husband at the end of the last season, is more advanced in her grieving process than I am. I tuned in just as she was having mad, passionate sex with some tall, dark handsome guy on her kitchen table. My kitchen table is covered with the remains of a TV dinner and my wedding photos, possibly a bit of a turn off if a tall, dark handsome bloke waltzes into my life. You’ve gotta give it to Nina though it appears she’s got great fashion sense, two blokes vying for her attention, a job, a baby and the whole grief thing happening. How DOES she find the ENERGY.
Here in real world grief town I’m wearing my pyjamas far too long into the day, the only bloke I see is the mailman delivering the bills, I’m still on the unemployed list and my babies are grouchy teenagers. How come nobody makes a TV series about my life?
It seems people are very invested in Nina’s situation though. When she tried to have a one-night stand six months after the husband’s death they wrote COLUMNS about it. On Mamamia and The Daily Mail people had opinions on whether it was too soon for her to move on. PEOPLE SHE’S A FICTIONAL CHARACTER!
Frankly, if she was real and she managed to sort out a babysitter and get out of the house six months after her husband’s funeral in decent underwear, with her legs shaved, contraception sorted and sexy enough to pick-up I think we should give her a standing ovation.
I find it amazing people have an opinion on how grief should be played out.
There’s no standard practice for this, every day brings up a different challenge. In our household we each approach our sadness in different ways, none of them wrong, just different.
It’s not all blackness, there’s still laughter. We know we have to continue to move forward, that we can’t come to a complete standstill, no matter how much we might like to. So we get up, put one foot in front of the other and do our best.
Everyone on the real-world grief train needs to find their own way through in whatever time frame works for them.
hello janine – exactly right. there isn’t one way. although your teens are grouchy, i’m glad you three have each other. stay in your pajamas as long as you want! peace, n
So, so true. How could there be a wrong way to grieve? You are an amazing woman and you are walking through your grief exactly how you should be and how you need to be. Hugs to you. Heather
You make so much sense Janine. It seems you’re doing a remarkable job at coping, let alone continuing to put one foot in front of the other. xxxx
Oh you’re a great writer.
I cried when Patrick died and wrote a piece on how attached we can get to characters.
I’m sorry you’re in a state of grief. I hope you’re ok. Most of all I’m glad you’re able to laugh and see the sunshine.
Have you read Sarah Wayland’s blog called That Space Between? She writes and researches grief. It’s worth a read.
Thank you Carly, yes I’ve read Sarah’s blog, she’s great. Yes we are doing OK, thanks for stopping by I’ll go and check out your Patrick post.
A beautiful post, and so true.
Thank you Lee-Anne.