This Sunday here in Australia mothers around the country will sip tepid tea and chow down on dry toast lovingly prepared by the children in their lives. Breakfast in bed is a bit of a tradition on mother’s day. Often followed by lunch out with the Grandmas, thankfully cooked by a professional chef as opposed to a three-year-old who still doesn’t have the hand-eye coordination to butter correctly.
My path to parenting was very straight forward. It was really a case of oops, that’s done it. I’ve written in the past about my experience of pregnancy and birth it wasn’t pretty, but we muddled on through. I never experienced maternal urges because I fell pregnant before I had a chance to consider whether I wanted to be a mother or not. I was 29 and married so it wasn’t really a dilemma, just an Oh God what am I supposed to do with this thing called a baby? In hindsight, I could easily have spent the next ten years making excuses about why it wasn’t a good time to have a child, with a good chance of procreation procrastination leading to a child-free life. It would have been a different course, not better or worse, just different.
As it turned out motherhood would change everything. All decisions now filtered through “how will this affect the children?”. Compromises had to be made. Reorganisation and readjustment became the norm.
It’s a weird state of affairs to find yourself totally responsible for another individual. Yet every day multiple women around the world are handed that responsibility and awarded the title “mother”, usually with little to no preparation.
In cases like mine the title is bestowed easily, yet for other women the motherhood journey is not so simple. This week on Shambolic Living we are going to hear from some of my lovely friends, who have each come to be mothers by an assortment of methods, step-mothering, fertility treatment, adoption, and the generosity of a donor. It has been awe-inspiring to watch these women overcome challenges and difficulties and go on to create their families. First post will be up tomorrow morning.
What was your journey to motherhood? Was it an easy ride or fraught with detours and distractions?
Wonderful post Janine, look forward to hearing each woman’s story. My road was easy (didn’t even have morning sickness). I did wait five years though before having the second one, it took me that long to get over the shock if motherhood!
Oh yes Catherine the shock of motherhood takes some getting used to!
I worried. read books and worried some more before my first child because i had never held a baby but although it is a shock when I got home, the instant I held my newborn, I was a mother full
Yes there was a great fear of the unknown when pregnant, it’s great when they arrive with their own little personalities.
4 Children by the time I was 26! I was a natural, never sick, barely gained weight and always lost the extra weight quickly, sometimes leaving the hospital weighing less than before I became pregnant. Being a mom was something that I had always looked forward to and I still consider my best achievement …and I loved every minute spent with those messy little humans! Now that my children are grown and I’ve recently become a grandmother (again, the first grandchild God took too soon) I am overjoyed again at the wonder of new little people. I get the honor of babysitting while the parents are at work and love every squeak, every smile, every cry…grandchildren really are better!
I reckon grandchildren will be great – all care, no responsibility. Your love of your family is evident – even watching from the other side of the world.
Lovely post Janine… becoming a mother is certainly life changing and what a huge shock at the start! It’s the very best and the hardest job in the world I think.