I am exhausted this morning. Last night I played the longest, hardest game of soccer EVER. Oh all right, I was on the sideline but I swear I ran every inch of that field in my mind.
It was finals night. Five minutes from the end we were leading 1 – 0. The Grand Final was in sight. Then the opposition scored. As the ref blew the final whistle we were tied at 1 all. We went to ten minutes extra time we remained tied. We went to a penalty shoot-out, each team got five shots at goal, just a single player firing straight at the net. The goal keeper our only defence. Oh my God the pressure. Each team scored 2 goals. We went to a second penalty shoot-out.
By this point parents are pacing, clutching each other, and wondering how good the by-pass surgeon had been ’cause the heart was under a lot of pressure!
One shot hits the goal post and looks like it’s gone in – it hasn’t – our player gets another go – I don’t know why, the rules of soccer remain a confusing conundrum even five years in – by now parents are either turning blue from forgetting to breathe – or hyperventilating from excessive breath taking!
I lose track of where we are up to – but then the opposition scores and they leap into the air, hugging each other and cheering.
We’ve lost.
By one point.
We are now officially the unluckiest soccer team to have ever donned football boots.
In our first year playing together we lost in the semi final in a penalty shoot-out after extra time.
In our second year of playing together we were playing above our age grade by at least two years – the competition was bigger, stronger and a hell of a lot tougher – we never made the semis.
In our third year of playing together we lost a lot of our players to a rival club – we were still playing above our age – we never made the semis.
In our fourth year of playing together we played the semi-final on the day half the girls had completed a fundraising walkathon at school and the other half were fighting the worse epidemic of flu the town had seen in years – we lost.
And now this.
They hug each other. They tell the goal-keeper she’s awesome. They laugh.
The parents want to cry, swear or drink (OK that might have just been me) but instead we clap the girls off the field and give the coach three cheers.
Nobody warned me that having your kids play a team sport would be so damn EMOTIONAL!
Why do we give up our Friday nights to stand in the cold and the rain, our noses running, our feet turning to blocks of ice from the damp ground underneath?
Because playing a team sport is a life lesson.
You have deal with a variety of personalities, idiosyncrasies and quirks. You have to work together. Playing to each other’s strengths, compensating for weaknesses. You have to follow the coach’s orders. You have to accept the ref’s call – even when you don’t agree with it. You have to learn to contain your own emotions, anger, nerves, and get on with the job, your team needs you.
You have to learn to celebrate victory with grace and wear loss with dignity.
You discover resilience and make plans for how it will be different next year.
Girls you were all brilliant both on-the-field and off. Your parents are all really proud of you.
(Note to my readers who were there last night – yes I know the photo above is from a different year – I was too busy playing the game in my head to take photos last night. I am also aware I may have the chronology of years a little askew but I AM EMOTIONALLY DISTRAUGHT THIS MORNING AND CANNOT BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR CHECKING FACTS. All of those things happened I’m just not sure in what order they occurred).
That’s funny Janine as I just thought, “oh daughter no. 2 and brother-in-law are in the photo – that’s nice”. Never occurred to me that she had her hair in a pony tail last night, not plaits! I must still be getting over the emotion of it all, it certainly was a nail biter As we’ve said before, there’s always next year! Got to get through daughter no. 2’s netball grand final next weekend. I can assure you that there won’t be anywhere near as much good sportsmanship being bandied about on the netball court, and that’s just talking about the parents!
It was excruciating wasn’t it?
I’ll tell you one of the reasons why we do it – because when they win, watching your beyond-joyous kid jumping around in excitement with their teammates is simply the BEST!
I have only just this minute walked in the door with my victorious 14 year old son after they won their grand final, and achieved back-to-back rugby union premierships! The game was tight right from the get-go, meaning plenty of those heart-stopping moments that you described! I never sit down whilst watching (too nerve-wracking) so I’m normally the one walking laps of the field. That’s why I feel utterly exhausted right now, lol. I see some resting on the couch in my immediate future. 🙂
There’s no better way to teach our kids life lessons than on a sports field, IMO. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
So glad someone got to enjoy victory this weekend! Well done to your son and his team. It is sooo exhausting isn’t it.
We were thrilled with the win but now I’m knackered! Who knew winning was so tiring?? Currently reclining on the lounge, cold cider in hand, waiting for The Provider to bring home a pizza for dinner. Ahhhh. 🙂
I can’t get my son to want to play to save my life….
That’s a shame, but enjoy the lack of obligation, once he starts playing it really ties up your weekends.
I remember those days! The kids get over it a lot faster than we do.
They move on so quickly while mum and dad are dragging ourselves around the house worn out and deflated.
Oh my goodness I love your blog! I love that you don’t have any celebrity friends, and I love that your kiddos soccer games are your own and darn it you so deserve them to be– geesh they are a whole lotta work for mamas. =)
Aloha,
Following ya now from the Bloggy Mom’s September link up. If you’re up for a bit of a ride I’d love it if you’d join me at localsugarhawaii.com where we’re riding the wave of life one little adventure at a time.
xo,
Nicole
localsugarhawaii.com
Thank you for stopping by.
our five year old grandson Dwight said they tried so they are still winners
Thank you Dwight.
Aw, I’m a little envious actually. My daughter played basketball for a year or so and I loved it. She didn’t. Am hoping the next two might be team sports-people. Preferably an indoor sport again but I’ll take a cold, early morning if they do bacon and egg rolls.
An INDOOR sport that would be so wonderful. I’ve almost lost toes to the frostbite!
I can understand that – the fact that it’s a job to be on the sidelines I mean. All throughout high school I had a coach that told me we weren’t allowed to be quiet on the sidelines, so I was always yelling something – “come on Angela!”, “behind you”, “open”, “watch where you’re kicking it”, “you’ve got Kelly up there”, etc, etc. Now I find that whenever I’m watching a game I mumble all of these things under my breath and look crazy.
I understand, and I can relate to the stress of sports. Its such a great feeling when my kids’ faces are shining from having just won a game or improving a time. But, it doesn’t always work out perfectly, like life. I agree with you that sports are such a great life lesson, for dealing with the ups and downs. Learning to keep moving forward no matter what. There will be setbacks, but persistence, hard work, and consistency will always be rewarded in the long run. Sports teach our kids that lesson.
I can tell in your post that you have a great sense of humor, and I’m certain that your personality is helping your kids to retain their love for the sport, no matter what. I try to keep it light too, even when the scoreboard is recording a loss or slower time. We have to continue to smile and cheer at all times. 🙂 We want them to love sports for their whole life, and this is the time to make it as positive as possible.
So glad I found your blog!
Oh, I love this post and can so relate. I am fairly certain I have said exactly this that you wrote above, “Nobody warned me that having your kids play a team sport would be so damn EMOTIONAL!”
So happy I found you through BYW!
I know it was such a shock to find yourself getting so caught up in it! The kids were devastated but they seemed to get over it a lot quicker than the parents!