There’s dinner at George Clooney’s house up for grabs in a fundraising campaign for Obama.
I’ve scrounged under the cushions, in the pockets of the kid’s uniforms and through every crevice in the car and I’ve got $8.50 to put forward.
It’s got to get me in, George can’t possibly have a dinner party without me.
I bring so much to the event.
I’m a great conversationalist, I can talk about my kids for hours. Oh you’re not that into kids? Alright let’s forget I’ve got kids.
How about we go straight to the important stuff – are you in camp Jennifer or camp Angelina? C’mon I know Brad’s your pal surely you took him to one side and said Maaaaate that Angelina is trouble?
OK you are above tawdry gossip, I get that.
But I’ve got to say this rich crowd, I don’t reckon they are gonna be a lot of fun. I think you could do with someone from the wrong side of the tracks to add some light and shade to the event.
Seriously, after a couple of glasses of wine I can be highly entertaining – and if multi-millionaires can’t take a joke that’s their problem.
No, no, I promise I’ll behave, I won’t even swear. Unless they are really up-themselves and then maybe just a little bit to, you know, shock them, ’cause that could be funny.
I’ve got perfect table manners – and what I don’t know I’ll fudge my way through – but let me tell you too much cutlery is unnecessary.
When I brush my hair and slap on a bit of make-up I can be halfway presentable. Frankly, you’ve been spending too much time with high maintenance chicks who take days to get ready for a night out – 10 minutes I can be showered, dressed, made-up and out the door. Think of how much time that will save!
Remember George it’s all very well to raise millions but I hear election campaigns are expensive you don’t want to run out of cash at the last hurdle do you? This $8.50 could be the difference to getting over the line.
I reckon I’m a must-have addition to your dinner party Georgie you’ll put me on the guest list won’t you?
Whose dinner party would you like to go to?
nmsullivan0909 says
very funny, janine!
orples says
Given the fact that Georgie supports Obama to begin with is reason enough for me not to want to have dinner with him. I’d rather have my $8.50. I heard this dinner was going for something like $35,000.00 per plate. Ludicrous.
shambolicliving says
Orples when I was writing the post I thought of you – I was guessing you wouldn’t be impressed by the whole George/Obama thing. Right so $35,000 a plate you reckon – wonder how much more spare change I can whip up??
orples says
I was devastated when I found out George was an Obama supporter. No brains to go with the beauty in that package, it seems. 🙁 . I can’t believe George can’t see what Obama is doing to America … to the World. It’s a heart breaker, for sure.
rommel says
BWAHAHAHA. Fun read.
I don’t know what to suggest, whether go for the silent innocent type or go for the static.
Ooh ooh talk about how you going to feature him in wordpress. Hehe
firstandfabulous says
Give it your best shot, girl! Even with spinach between his teeth…OMG! That smile! Good luck.
shambolicliving says
I reckon I’m a shoe-in.
Robin Croome says
george doesn’t know what he is missing – dinner with a real woman
shambolicliving says
And one that actually eats food!
Ally says
Mmmmm…if you need a travelling companion Janine, I’m sure I could spare the time!
shambolicliving says
You are booked in.
Leanne Barnes says
Have shared this blog with a friend who is a HUGE George fan – very funny… You would fit in perfectly having dinner with George and Obamah…. Good luck with your $8.50, I’m sure you are in with a real chance. I look forward to reading your post on the night!!!
shambolicliving says
Wouldn’t it be a cracker of a post!
Jen says
Can’t wait for the post on the night…definetly a cracker !!
ChrystinaNoel says
I think you make a lot of good points. Surely he’ll invite you 🙂
Dawne at D Magazine says
Great post!
I had made some vids of him when he was here about two weeks ago! I ran across this post and thought you might like them!
http://dmagazine.me/2012/05/09/i-swear-these-are-the-last-two-more-with-his-cloony-ness/