Comments on: Work or Stay at Home An Old and Ugly Debate https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/ Thu, 03 May 2012 11:33:57 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=7.0 By: Juggling two jobs at once « 365 Completed Tasks https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3525 Thu, 03 May 2012 11:33:57 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3525 […] isn’t easy though. Ask any work from home parent and they’ll tell you it like juggling two jobs at once. The only  way to do it seems to be […]

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By: Fluffy Rankin https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3524 Sun, 29 Apr 2012 05:40:13 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3524 “The curtain Raiser’s” post had a great line about inner conflict.II feel that this debate is all about inner conflict and how well each woman deals with it. For me the inner conflict was soothed when my youngest went to school. I was no longer torn between working and being a mum. I reasoned that everyone else in the household was somewhere (School or work) so I should be to. The guilt’s still raise their heads, however, my kids understand that I get to what I can, hubbysayno will also get to events, so between us we make an appearance. I still get confused when grade parent events are organised in the middle of the day and I often wonder who attends these..I guess that will just remain a mystery to me.

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By: Confessions of a Stay-at-home Dad https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3523 Wed, 25 Apr 2012 14:30:43 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3523 […] is what we call dad guilt. You feel guilty that you didn’t have the best job out of you & your wife to deem her to stay […]

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By: Madhu https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3522 Mon, 23 Apr 2012 05:39:57 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3522 Agree with Diane above, that we know how to pile on the guilt! I had no choice but to be a SAHM till my daughter was in her teens because we lived on a tea plantation with not many opportunities. Loved the perks of that life but yearned for more! The remote location also meant we had to send our daughter to boarding school for a few years and that made me feel guilty! When we moved to the city I was so glad to have her with us again, but I now kept crazy schedules, sometimes from 9 am up to the middle of the night, just before handing over a project! More guilt! I took off from work for a whole year when she got engaged to be able to spend more time with her and to assuage the guilt a bit. I didn’t absolutely need to work to put food on our table but the extra income helped, a lot! I guess we do what we have to do and somehow cope with the guilt. Looking at my daughter now, I know I did mostly right 🙂

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By: shambolicliving https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3521 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 21:44:45 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3521 In reply to homeagainjog.

I love your attitude. I think you give me a glimpse into what Hippie Child may be like when she grows up – blissful is the life of the daydreamer. I’m working on the guilt thing. Thank you Home Again Jog

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By: homeagainjog https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3520 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 21:36:33 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3520 Guilt, the gift that keeps on giving.

I’m so weird. I don’t feel guilty about much, unless I know I’ve done something wrong, but the ever-present, nebulous “guilt” feeling is one that I don’t have. I’m a SAHM who’s trying to be a WAHM and I’m fine with that. I’ve never felt judged… but that could be because I didn’t notice… I’d have to zone in more often (blissful is the life of a day-dreamer). I don’t judge the choices that other women make either, because, what is the point. I have other things to do than worry about how the mom’s I know spend their days. When I heard Ms. Rosen’s comment I thought ” Gee, I sure feel like I work” and that was the end of it. I did think is was funny how the Republicans took it and ran with it. The Dems are having fun with Ted Nugent’s endorsement of Romney so everyone has something scandalous to rant about. Oh the fun. Anyway, if you love your kids and you’re trying to do the best you can by them, then things seem to turn out fine. We can all improve in some areas and we all have the things we’re good at, so I think it balances out. Awesome, thought-provoking article! Oh, and stop feeling guilty Janine! You’re a great mom!

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By: shambolicliving https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3519 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 04:16:44 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3519 In reply to Rachel @ The Kids Are All Right.

Bloody oath it does test the best of relationships.

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By: shambolicliving https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3518 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 04:15:59 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3518 In reply to Diana Douglas.

God I wish there was medication you could take to cure yourself of guilt!

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By: shambolicliving https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3517 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 04:15:32 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3517 In reply to the curtain raiser.

Someone told me once kids need you more as teenagers than they do as babies. An interesting thought. I can imagine there would be some adjustment to go from being financially equal for all those years to being a SAHM. But it’s good to hear you are enjoying the change.

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By: Diana Douglas https://shambolicliving.com/2012/04/19/work-or-stay-at-home-an-old-and-ugly-debate/#comment-3516 Thu, 19 Apr 2012 03:35:09 +0000 http://shambolicliving.wordpress.com/?p=2111#comment-3516 Women are so good at feeling guilty, no matter what they do. If we stay at home, we should be out working. If we work, we should be home with the kids. When it comes to motherhood there’s no end to the ways we can pile on the guilt. We need to give ourselves permission to be imperfect. There’s no joy in trying to attain an impossible goal.

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